some things just don't need to be said

What was said...

"So when are you due?"
"I'm not pregnant"
"Oh, so did you just have a baby?"
"No."
Awkward silence.

What was heard..
"So you seem somewhat fat, do you have a good reason for that?"
"No."
"But, you are so fat there must be some good reason for it."
"I'm afraid there isn't."
Awkward silence.

Actually, I know I am not fat, but since my last surgery, most of the weight I gained back went straight to my stomach, so I have a little pooch. However, I do not need perfect strangers pointing this out to me. Ever.