Our first month

Maddie Day One

Maddie Day 36

Actually, it has been five weeks, but I never got around to posting last week.

I'm tired to the n'th degree but, I love being a mom.  Maddie is so beautiful and sweet.  I can hardly believe that Spencer and I had a hand in creating her.  Motherhood is both harder and easier than I thought it would be.  We have a wonderful support system and so that makes taking breaks easier that it would be easier, but then again there are no real breaks to being a parent.

I don't really have any wise insight into this parenthood role. Right now I am just managing from day to day, enjoying my beautiful princess while I change her, feed her and rock her to sleep.  She's growing so big already.  She's out of preemie clothes and  into newborn sizes. I know that to everyone else she is still tiny, but to me she is growing up too fast already.  I look forward to the years ahead, but I am a little sad that each day is a day we won't have again.

Pictures of Maddie

My favorite picture of my Princess

Me and my girl!

Isn't she adorable?

"After Jenny Craig"

Daddy and Maddie

"I'm ready to go home now!"

Madelyn Scout Brown's Birth Story

Well, this has been a very long week, but we made it through, and now we are home, safe and sound with a brand new addition to our family.

Baby Madelyn was due on Nov 28th, but because of my preeclampsia, the Dr decided that it was too dangerous to wait longer than my 37 weeks point in my pregnancy.

On Thursday, Nov 6th at 9pm, we entered the hospital to begin the induction process. As you can see from the picture on the left, I began the night with high hopes and a positive attitude.  Little did I know how long the road ahead of me would be.

At my last check up, my cervix was completely closed and long, and so I needed to start with a drug called Cervidil that would soften my cervix and hopefully begin my contractions.  The drug did start some contractions, but by morning, my cervix hadn’t changed at all.

At that point, I was moved downstairs to the labor and delivery and started on another drug called Cervedex. That one didn’t do anything at all. It didn’t even give me a single contraction. Several hours later, we moved on to try number three and I was give the “Big Daddy” drug Pitocin. Stike number 3. Late that night they tried the Cervidil again, which again gave me some contractions, but didn’t progress labor at all.

So, by Saturday morning, more than 24 hours after we started the process, my Cervix had not changed one bit. I wasn’t feeling any contractions, and nothing was working at all. Since it was the weekend, the Dr on call, transferred me back upstairs until he could consult with my Dr., and they could decide the next step. In the meantime, he decided to test my protein levels to see how my Preeclampsia was doing.

At this point Spencer and I were very frustrated. We had been sure that by Sat at the latest, we would be holding our little girl in our arms. A c-section was seeming like a stronger possibility, but all the Dr’s and nurses I spoke too said that it would be best to avoid one, due to my previous abdominal surgeries and the possibility of scar tissue getting in the way.

Sunday evening, I was given Cervedex one last time, and again it had no effect on me. I was beginning to think that I would be pregnant for the rest of my life! However, on Monday morning, the plan quickly changed. My test had come back, and my protein levels were over 11,000. Since they consider a level of over 300 bad, you can see why my numbers had them worried. A c-section was planned for later that day.

Amazingly enough, while I had hoped for a natural birth, I wasn’t disappointed with the news. I really felt that I had given my best effort, and in the end, it just wasn’t meant to be.

At about 5:30 they wheeled me into the O.R.. The c-section itself wasn’t to. bad. I just felt a few pulls and tugs. I just had to stop my mind from guessing what the Dr was doing. I really didn’t want to imagine him slicing me open, etc. It was a little annoying that the Doctors doing the procedure kept talking about football, golf, etc. the entire time. Didn’t they know that this was our special moment? Oh well, it didn’t last long, because exactly at 6pm, they pulled Madelyn out and we heard her cry. The Dr. told Spencer to stand up and look, something he wasn’t sure he had the stomach to do, but in a moment he did, and had his first glimpse of our daughter.

There was a scary moment when I heard a nurse ask the Dr. if she should get NICU, and he said yes. I was terrified that something was wrong with my little girl. It turned out that she came out with the cord wrapped twice around her neck and a huge knot in her cord. Fortunately, NICU wasn’t needed at all. Despite her small size (4lbs 14 ounces), she was perfectly formed and healthy.

The only problem left, was that it took almost 20 minutes for them to show he

r to me. Spencer had to take pictures of her on our camera and let me see them on the view screen so I could see our precious Madelyn.

Finally, they brought her over, wrapped up tight like a little baby burrito. She was so adorable. She kept blowing little air bubbles with her mouth. It was love at first sight. Spencer and I couldn’t take out eyes off of her. They placed her in my arms and let me hold her as they wheeled me to recovery. 

My entire body was shaking because of the surgery and anesthesia. All I could do was focus every bit of my energy towards holding my precious cargo as carefully as I could.

She'll be here soon!

Tonight at 9m I am going to the hospital to begin the induction process.  They'll give me something called Cervidil that is supposed to soften the cervix and hopefully start contractions.  They may send me home for the night to labor there for a while or they may keep me.  It depends on the speed of the labor and my blood pressure.  From what friends and family have told me, the induction process could be super quick, like 4 hours or super long, like 48 hours.  I'm obviously hoping for the former.  There is a possibility of a c-section if I don't progress, or my blood pressure goes up significantly.  I'm trying not to have any specific expectations, because I know that the birthing process rarely goes according to any sort of laid out plan.

No matter what, in a very short time, I'm going to be a Mommy, and Spencer is going to be a Daddy!  Is it really possible that our lives are going to irrevocably change in a matter of hours from now?  I've been watching the Baby shows on TLC all day to get myself mentally prepared, but I don't think it will seem real until little Madelyn is in my arms.  I can't wait to meet her!

A new perspective

I already posted this on facebook, but since I use this blog as my journal, I wanted to post it here.  I wrote it yesterday morning, the day after the election.

A late night phone call...

Last night at around 10:10 pm our phone rang. Now as you imagine this conversation, I want you to imagine the thickest, most southern accent possible for the other woman in the conversation. As far as I can tell by her voice, she is an elderly black woman.

Me: Hello
Billy (name on caller ID): Martha?
Me: You have the wrong number
Billy: No I don't. Bomba won! Whoever you are! Bomba won! Bomba won!
Me: I know I just heard
Billy: I'm tryn' to call my Sister in Louisiana, cause Bomba won! i just need to tell someone! Bomba won!
Me: (Laughing) Congratulations
Billy: Were you already in bed?
Me: Yes
Billy: I'm sorry, but Bomba won!
Me: (Laughing some more.) That's Ok, Congratulations.
We then hang up.

Listen, Obama or as that sweet old black lady calls him , Bomba, was not my first choice to win last night. I don't agree with most of what he has planned for our country. However, I can't deny that I am excited by the fact that we now have our first minority president. Thee woman who called last night grew up in a time where a president who had the same color skin as her was an impossible dream. Maybe his accomplishment will inspire the minority children at my school to work a little harder, knowing that the ceiling they had always assumed existed, just isn't there anymore.  So while I'm not happy for myself at the results, maybe I can at least be happy for Billie.

I wish McCain had won, but I am going to see in the bright side in Obama's victory. America is stronger than one man. We survived Clinton, we'll survive Obama. Either he'll prove me wrong, and do a good job, or in four years we'll get someone better in there. America is going to be just fine.

Lots of random stuff!

I got a hair cut!  What do you think?  It is quite a bit shorter than I asked for, but I like how it turned out anyway.

Last Saturday was my baby shower.  It was so much fun!  I, well, actually Madelyn, got lots of adorable pink clothes and other various adorable baby stuff.  She is going to be very stylish.

Last week we went to the Texas State Fair, twice!  The first time we ate all of the prerequisite fried food, like fried snickers, corn dogs, and a funnel cake.  We also went to the corniest show in the world, it was called "Dancing with the Dogs."  It was literally people doing various dances with their dogs to songs like "Thriller" and "We will Rock You."  Plus Spencer won Madelyn her very first stuffed animal!  The second time we went was to see Michelle Branch perform.  She is one of our favorite singers.  She even sang some new stuff off her upcoming album.

This week was my birthday.  I am now officially of "Advanced Maternal Age."  Ugh.  I hate when the doctor calls me that!  It was a good birthday though, Spencer got me the best present ever, a Kindle!  If you don't know what it is, look it up on Amazon.  It is the most amazing device ever.  I feel really spoiled!

The preggo returns

I know I haven't written lately, but every time I try to compose something, it mostly feels like I am whining about the uncomfortableness that is pregnancy.  But, then again, maybe I just need to get it all out, right?

I cannot believe how many ways being pregnant affects your body.  I mean, I knew about the weight gain, the hormones, and the frequent peeing, but that is just the tip of the iceberg!

Who knew...

that my eyesight would be blurry

my feet and ankles would swell up like balloons

a sneeze could make me pee my pants

I would become a klutz

...and forgetful

Sleeping on my side could be so painful

My skin would grow weird bumps

That a 3 pound baby could pinch so many nerves

However, I do love to feel her moving inside me, even when it tickles, pinches, or downright hurts.  She is a part of me in a way that she will never be again.  It is pretty cool.  Although, I'm hoping that selective amnesia that I have been told by Moms in the know will kick in after she comes, or she may just be an only child!